Tags
blessings, companion, company, dogs, family pets, Forever pets, friendship, grieving, lessons in life, loss, love, loyalty, mourning, Pets, Tammy girl, unconditional love
I’ve been wondering if I will ever feel brave enough to write down these words but seeing as this blog tells the story of our lives, it must include the sadness when it comes among the triumphs and lessons that make up the whole of it. This one is a lesson of love, unconditionally given by a little four legged girl who, all she wanted was to love and be loved and I hope that for 15 and a bit years, that we did that for her. For what she gave to us as a family over that time, were innumerable moments of love in return, happiness in spades and a loyalty you cannot find elsewhere. In particular during some dark days in our lives, she was always there, providing comfort and a knowing that no matter what, she would always be there…
Four weeks have now passed without the sounds of her little pitter patter across the kitchen floor, her incessant bark when we let her in the back door saying hi when we came home from work, four weeks since we heard the familiar sound of snoring coming from down beside my chair where she would follow me into the lounge room carrying the blanket which meant she could come and rest her head beside me each every night and four weeks since we said goodbye to her for the very last time…
Its so quiet sitting here without you,
I still go to reach down to pat you even though I know you’re not here,
and I never realised that the damn dog next door
sounds just like you used to,
so much so,
that it catches my breath
each time I hear it…
You were such a sweetheart
&
an every day part of my life Tammy girl,
always just here besides me
along with my thoughts,
always with a smile at the end of a long day
always under my feet,
and never far away…
that
I forgot to realise
that someday
this would not always be…
Tomorrow, your ashes are coming home
and we will place you in your special garden
at the back door
where you sat
I will buy a special chair,
with a plaque called
~ Tammy’s garden ~
and it can be a special place
where we can sit and remember…
Thankyou for your sweetest love.
My beautiful Tammy girl xx
We named her Tammy, I named her actually when we bought her home after going on a family expedition to a shopping plaza to buy a slow cooker with absolutely, no intention of coming home with a puppy for Mel. As a family at the time, we were struggling to understand the unfairness of losing my mother and brother in the same year and needed some much injected happiness into the household after we had tried a few optional animals, hamsters and a bird I sadly managed to kill one frosty morning.
However, that special day over 15 years ago lead us past a pet shop in the days when puppies were still sold from them and on this particular day, found us all looking lovingly at a little brown runt with the cutest little black face shying in the corner of the window. Within half an hour of us walking into that shop, Tammy came home to live with us.
From that moment on Tammy became a very much loved new member of our family. The kids were 9 and 10 years old at the time and a perfect age to welcome this new little member into our household. Tammy was a real family dog, she belonged to us all.
When we first bought her home, Little black face…
With all the moves we had over the years and the kids growing up out of primary school, into secondary then becoming adults themselves, Tammy was the one constant in our lives, who just never seemed to change or get any older until this year. No matter if we were happy or sad, Tammy was always just a part of all the celebrations, all the events with extended family members, she loved mixing with a crowd, happy to sit and join in with games in the back yard. She loved it when the yard was full of all of the kids friends and lounged around with them when they all became teenagers. They all loved Tammy too and were happy to let her hang with them whatever they were doing…
Here she is enjoying one of our backyard parties…
Tammy with Mel, the love is so pure…and utterly adorable…
Tammy had two mummy’s, both Mel and I took honour of that title and when we moved away from Melbourne, Tammy stayed with Mel as it was the only home she knew so Mel began taking full care of her for a few years before she came back home to us in her later years. I believe she helped Matt a lot at home just keeping him company when he was unwell with chronic fatigue. She would sit with him outside and ease some bad days or help him get moving with a bit of exercise throwing her plastic chicken toy around the yard. She had many names as well because we all made up our own fond versions, but she didn’t mind, as long as she was being involved, she would answer to all of them. A few of those versions were: Tammy, Tammy girl, The Tampster, Tammy whammy, buddy old yak, and old lady Tammy was her most recent new name as she became older and grayer in her later years…
Tammy keeping Matt company…never far away…
Family pets teach families about a lot of things, responsibility, empathy, love for animals and unconditional love, but mostly what Tammy gave to me was her friendship and the knowing that I was her ‘go to’ person.
But sadly, our pets cannot stay with us forever and there comes a time which came for us on the 29th September that we had to make a decision to let her go – a decision which was made because we loved her. We were told a week before that she had advanced Lymphoma and was in pain and because of her age, any treatment was futile. Timing is never good but poor Bill was planning on spending a lot more time with Tammy once he retired, sadly that just wasn’t to be…
I believe Tammy knew on that last day that we were taking her to a place where the pain would soon end. This was her last smile to us, and it says a thousand words…
farewell my Tammy girl,
you will be in my heart forever you special soul…